#6 - Action

DreamWidth Mirror
Mood: cheerful
Location: at our desk,
Music: Wolf Totem by the HU, somehow?

What is your most exciting noemata?
05/11/2021. total words: 2377

   WE ARE ALL ANSWERING THIS. Below the cut!

   You know the Story of Evil if you've ever been into Vocaloid. Or rather, you know Servant of Evil, and that's about all you need. See, after the events of the Original Sin Story, I died sometime during that and got put into the Hellish Yard, to nobody's surprise. Well, I climbed back out after a few hundred years and went straight back to Calgaround as a ghost to see what was up.
   They put a cafe where our lobby was. Amazing. Most of Apocalypse was locked down so once everything fell apart, getting into our areas was almost impossible. So they just... set up a cafe in our lobby, and probably never found anything more than a couple of stashed handguns from before my twin brother blew up the country. (He's valid, so we all know where I stand on that.)
   The fun thing, though? Princess Riliane Lucifen d'Autriche declared war on Elphegort (because apparently Calgaround now belongs to Elphegort???) and said "kill every green-haired girl until you find the one my fiance likes" because that's Pride for ya. Well, here I am, leader of a criminal empire reduced to dust, chilling in ghost form atop his headquarters, and you just declared war.
   I was sitting on an entire mafia's worth of high-tech, high-magic military equipment. I had Star Wars guns to bring to the French Revolution. And she up and declared war on us. Brilliant!
   I sent word to my fellow Ghoul Child, Keel Freezis (we'd met a couple of times, because his wife was my descendant and he was virtually my twin, and thus we kept in contact) and told him to send as many Elphe women as he could my way. Every green-haired woman he could get out of the line of fire. That sounds very uncharacteristically charitable of me, doesn't it? Me the leader of Apocalypse, bloodthirsty mafia boss? It sure does.
   It took the mayor of Calgaround two weeks before he came to the cafe to speak with me, and really, it only happened because a child asked me if they were going to die, so I told them to tell the mayor to come to the cafe at sundown the following week and if he came, they wouldn't die. I'd sent word to him twice, but he really hated acknowledging my presence up on the plateau (something something don't believe in the ghosts even though he convinced the entire town to only set off fireworks on the plateau so he can help).
   Eventually, he came. Walked into the cafe with assault rifles and plasma guns and energy knives and all sorts of gear just scattered across the cafe in piles, and here I am, cleaning a plasma rifle with a rag sitting on a table, acting as serene as a girl waiting to hear her husband drop dead from poison.
   I looked up, smiling. He looked at me like he's just seen a ghost (pun of course intended). I said hello, how do you do, and asked him very pleasantly what his plans are for the war. He spluttered. My smile faded and I gave him the expression of a man sizing up his prey for the kill. I held up the gun, informed him flatly I 'd sent word to my allies across the country to send all the Elphe women here, and he ought to tell his city they now answer to me until the war is over, because I have equipment and weapons and strategy, and the Lucifenians didn't have magic to bring to the table like I did.

   I have this very vivid memory of sitting on a concrete wall, some thirty feet from the ground with my legs hanging over the edge, an automatic assault rifle in my hands and tucked just under my armpit beside my ribs, the barrel resting on top of a six year old's head gunning down Lucifenian soldiers with the six year old sniping with a plasma handgun taking out some of their infantry. It was loud, but not overly so, and I couldn't be shot. Anything would just pass through me. The child was Leviantan, not even Elphe, purple hair and all.

   We didn't actually defend more than Calgaround: we could have, but the army we made of civilians and refugees wasn't trained and it wouldn't have gone well. So we sat on the walls of Calgaround and wiped the floor with the Lucifenian army because we had better ranged weapons than they did. Now, our weapons weren't great by my standards, none of them were in use by magical hands and none had been properly used in several centuries, but against Lucifenians who barely understood how carbon steel worked, we did amazingly.
   So far as I know, we bought Germaine Avadonia's revolution the time she needed to make it to the palace, and no help was coming to save Riliane, because we went and slaughtered her army.
   It was about eighty years later that I got thrown out of the world entirely because Levia and Irina decided to have a go at it in my damn tomb where my remains were: the fighting was so intense I got thrown out of the world. Presumably, ended up here. Might've done some other things, but that was the most recent thing as far as I can tell.
   I had a gun resting on top of a six year old, and we slaughtered an army looking for genocide, and the memory is one of my clearest Pale noemata. You'll know who my canonmates are from long after OSS, because they'll remember the Leviantan ghost and the Elphe army showing up to a sword fight with plasma guns. I like to think we're great, personally.

   The first thing that came to mind was the time I ditched my boyfriend on a mission to fuck my Surplice, because that is just how I exist, and the second idea was that time I spent a week setting up an elaborate heist to get my father to go on a mission so I could fuck my twin. Again, just how I exist.
   I forgot, however, that time Luco and I terrorized Aquarius Tillian into death and right back out of it. See, Tillian was a hardass at best, and downright annoying at worst. Loved to hit on me and insult my twin, and then got mad when we stuck bugs in his bed. But one day he was very much hitting on me, so I pushed him off a cliff. And then I went home and when Papa Raitis said he was dead and found at the bottom of the cove, I played dumb about it all day.
   And then Luco and I snuck off to the Meikai, only to find him on trial. We went and jumped on our mother Garuda Madeleine's lap as she went through the trial, and Luco asked that he be punished to sort and count lentils forever for the crime of being annoying. It was granted as a request, and every time I passed him while doing my Spectre work, I pushed over his pile of lentils.
   I was a mean teenager, but he deserved it.

   It's not often the Grand Master sent two Gold Saints on a single mission to team up. But he knew who to send together and who to never, under any circumstance, send together. He sent Gemini Mavros and I together on two occasions, and I am to tell you about the second, solely because it's a lot funnier and a lot less depressing. It is also the story of how the Grand Master learned to never send us together on a mission again.
   The joke was on him, because Mavros and I have been together on a few Spectre missions, and the hilarity is always enjoyable.

   To be honest, I don't actually remember what our actual mission was. What I can tell you is that it did require us walking into Arcana Tenebris and going undercover into a faerie ball. I think that would have been Mavros' damning moment where he realized he was always going to follow me into the dark. I went with fins displayed, and a bit of magic was all it took to push him halfway into a dragon's form. We visited a local clan of other native Irish folks, I want to say we were in northern Galway but again I can't be certain, and they did our makeup for us.

   The real reason I don't remember most of the mission is because I spent most of it blackout drunk. So did Mavros, because good Irish whiskey is difficult to import to Greece, and we had access to local stuff. We were a month and a half late getting back, because we did our actual mission in about three days, and then got distracted. By distracted, I mean we went to a tavern to gather some intel (I think, anyhow), an English soldier walked in and started giving the band grief for playing local tunes in Irish and not in English, and that was such an affront to hospitality laws that I may or may not have stood up, gone over to the man, and decapitated him with my bare hands.
   Fortunately for me, there was another Fair man at the tavern that night. His name was Darragh, and not only did he help us with our mission, I distinctly recall him hooking up with Mavros.
   We may or may not have spent the next month and a half alternating between getting blackout drunk and helping the locals drive the English soldiers out of their villages. Mavros learned many things about strategy. I discovered a love for justified slaughter I didn't know I had.
   At some point, I gifted Mavros a kelpie I found. Mostly because I cast a spell of water-breathing on him, convinced him to get on a kelpie, and it decided to swear to him its undying loyalty because he didn't drown.
   I did notice eventually that we were supposed to actually go back to Greece, not liberate all of Ireland, and asked Mavros to Another Dimension us back. He did! He was also blackout drunk when he did it, so he dropped us in Shion's garden and then spent twenty minutes throwing up. It took us an hour to get up to the Grand Master's chambers, and then we had to sell an actual reason why we'd been late, and unfortunately, 'tried to liberate a third of Ireland' doesn't cut it. The problem was, I could not and still can't lie. I can say things that aren't true, but I can't lie.

   I think we sold him the idea that we'd both been heavily poisoned, and were still working the effects out of our systems, and had been kept unconscious for most of the time we were gone. Mavros did most of the talking. I was almost too drunk to stand, and mostly just nodded along and added details where I could be truthful about it.
   I don't think we actually convinced him of anything, and I'm very sure he knew we were just very, very drunk. He never teamed us up again, for some reason, despite Mavros being one of the few Gold Saints I tolerate for more than fifteen minutes.
   I wonder who could tell you why that might be...?

Southern Star
   I'm the last one to answer, and not going to lie, I'm blanking, owing largely to the discussion of Albafica's and Dohko's kinks in the server we share with our partner system. I'm not even sure what my favourite would be, as far as action's concerned: there's just been a lot, and it's not always a happy story.
   Maybe another time!

   (Note: Dohko is semi-permanently in his dragon form, and can't type nor talk. He does some weird kind of telepathy. Typically, Albafica translates and types for him.)

   :Ivy and I did Soul of Gold together. It was one of the last things I did as a Gold Saint, and largely because Ivy said I had to. It was weird dealing with the God Warriors, especially as the garrison put me into Helheim, and I have been hunting in Helheim many times. Whatever Loki had put together, I wasn't inclined to believe it to be real. I would have noticed if I was in Helheim, and I wasn't. Ivy was with me the entire time, and I kept sundering my clothes to her so she could stay warm. I did a lot of fighting there, and was very inconvenienced.:
   :Despite everything, they didn't let me just... burn down the tree. Mu was the only one who was even vaguely aware I wasn't as human as I looked, and none recognized Ivy for what she was. It was pretty funny the entire time, and it remains one of my favourite things to look back on.:
   :While it might seem ideal to talk about my family, I was asked for action, and that counts. My memories of the Holy War I fought in are overall... not pleasant. There were many good things, but they are bittersweet in hindsight. Fighting the God Warriors was one of the few things that was both an act of war and actually fun. I split my pants open right down the crotch once during that, trying to show off. Depressingly, Cancer Angelo was the only one who had a spare pair. Ivy gave me her shawl instead, and unfortunately, nobody understood the reference of me talking in an Irish accent with her shawl wrapped around my waist.:
   (I resent that statement immensely. -Al)
   :Unfortunately, Pisces Laures is Swedish, and nobody understood I was acting like you. I can do it again if you want.:
   (If you steal my kilts, I will bite you, Dohko. -Al)
   :I would steal Lugonis', but there's no telling where they've been. Yours are the only safe ones to take.:
   (Take Luteia's! -Al)
   :I can't. He's too thin and short. It'd be like wearing a miniskirt into a stripclub.:
   (I dislike that mental image almost as much. -Al)
   :You don't say.: